Hubby and I get to the hospital and can't quite believe how busy the surgery admit is. All of the beds are full! We take a chair and wait to be called. I am even more nervous now! Then the nurse calls me to take my vitals. We share a name so I take that as a good sign. I also learn that my scale at home matches the hospital and that all of my hard work really has paid off. Yeah!! She gives me an Ativan and so I can almost ignore the prisoner brought in by armed police men, remembering all of the "good signs" I've had!! I still have my phone and am answering texts and e-mails while on the ativan...probably not a good idea :).
Next we are brought to another room to wait. I am feeling more relaxed. I hold Hubby's hand and just wait. I have had surgery before but I have never walked directly into the surgery suite as I do this time. I hop up on the bed on my own as I have one last panic attack...wondering if I am really doing the right thing. I begin to cry but the nurse calms me down. She tells me that I'll walk up the same way I fall asleep so I try to smile. I am terrible with needles and they have a hard time getting the IV but I stay strong and smile. I ask which anesthetics they'll use and the anaesthtist tells me propofol. I hate that it will knock out my memory but I don't have a choice so I work hard at remembering everything. The surgery suite is so large and bright. I can smell the disinfectants and other chemicals and I love the pattern on the nurses surgical cap. It is decorated with pale pink flowers. The anesthetist injects the sedative IV and it stings so bad that my toes curl but then the assistant places a mask over my face and I don't remember anything else.